Funny Quotes, Funny Boy

"Mom, don't forget to not crash the car." As I was leaving one night.

"Mom, is that Heavenly Father?" Pointing to one of the counselors in our bishopric as he conducted Sacrament Meeting. He's an older white-haired man.

Before bed, Ben told Lucas a story about dinosaurs - explaining the difference between carnivores, herbivores, and omnivores.
Ben: "Lucas are you a carnivore, herbivore, or an omnivore?"
Lucas: "I'm a boy!"

"I love you really really much."

"I don't want to take a nap. But, I don't take a nap, I be sad."

"I don't want you to be angry with me." - always sad coming from a sweet little voice... usually around the time he won't take a nap.

Me: "Lucas, what are you going to be for Halloween?"
Lucas: "I'm going to be a witch. What you gonna be? You can be a biiig Elmo." (Lucas was supposed to be Elmo).
Me: "I thought you wanted to be Elmo and you wanted me to be a fairy?"
Lucas: "No, I'll be a fairy/witch and you can be Elmo, and Dad can be a witch, too."
Me: "I think a boy witch is called a wizard. You can be a wizard."
Lucas: "No, I'm going to be a witch."

"Mom, what my poop color?" Every time I change his diaper.

Lucas: "Kate has a girl-brother."
Me: "Yes, Kate's brother is Simon."
Lucas: "No, her name Audrey."
Me: "Oh, Audrey is Kate's sister..."

This morning as Ben was getting ready to leave for work:
"Some day I be a man and I go to work, too."

"Mommy, you my best friend, Mommy."